When I was younger I honestly didn't receive many hugs, kisses, well affection if you will.
For as long as I can remember I've never liked people touching me in any fashion. A poke, a tap, a hug, anything. I've always had such a hard time expressing affection toward other people.
Kind of strange for someone who is so sexual in nature, but true. In pertinence to any kind of romantic affection, I've always been the same way.
Okay so what's the point right?
The point is that for some reason, now, here at this point in time, one person has dared to challenge something rooted in me since childhood... oh and here's the kicker. Unintentionally. It's unintentional and they don't have a remote clue that they're even doing it.
I feel like a newborn looking at the world through eyes for the first time. New.
Yes, I will admit I am scared shitless of expressing affection, but I will also admit that I'm scared of not expressing affection with this person. I long for and crave this person's touch, kiss, voice... presence.
It's a beautifully blissful mess.
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